It's Easy to Forget Milestones

I had to go back and look up the date. A couple of days ago, August 10th, was the first anniversary of this blog! Yeah!

Part of me wants to downplay it. I tend to do that with things I value, from a long ago lesson that if I really care about something it will be taken away. (Therapy saved my life, but hasn’t yet removed that doubt.)

Where I Came From

Before I started Third of a Lifetime, I’d come back from several years of mental darkness and struggle. In the year prior, I’d started three other blogs that each died after a few months. I never allowed myself to become too attached to them. These failures reinforced my fears — that I’m not good enough, that I can’t seem to stick with anything very long, that I’d had a long string of attempting various writing projects, and not finishing them.

The Value of Twitter

So I began this blog with much trepidation, but resolved that this one is going to stick. It’s still here, a year later, in large part due to my having joined Twitter last September. I found a very knowledgeable and giving mental health community; resources galore; good friends; outside-of-the-box ideas; and simple fun. The fun is important, as I’d not had much for a long while.

With Twitter, you can see exquisite, valuable ideas and links, and then they scroll off into oblivion. The waste of it all bothered me. I wanted a way to save some of these things. I noticed that @JaneFriedman — publisher of Writers Digest — was also publishing weekly Best Tweets for Writers on her There Are No Rules blog. I asked how she gathers and compiles them. She was so gracious and generous with her info, including allowing me to copy (“clone”) her Yahoo Pipes aggregator. Unfortunately, I am no techie and never got it to work right, but that doesn’t matter because she gave me a taste of what is possible.

New Year’s Eve 2009

On New Year’s Eve, I published my first Best Tweets for Trauma Survivors. I also published the first weekly Favorite TweetStuff post, a compilation of endearing, inspiring, quirky, and fun tweets. It’s a way for me to not take myself so seriously.

Dissociation Blog Showcase

Along the way, I published the Dissociation Blog Showcase, a work in progress of currently 165 blogs! It’s the most popular page here, and I work each week to expand it. As always, if you, or anyone you know, blogs about experience with dissociation, let me know!

For someone who hadn’t finished much of anything for several years, I am very proud to say: both Best Tweets and Favorite TweetStuff have been published continuously every single Friday since New Year’s Eve 2009. These weekly posts, and the Dissociation Blog Showcase, give me a sense of meaning and purpose I’d not felt for many years.

And I have plans!

  • I am working on an annotated compilation of all the linked Best Tweet resources from 2010, and my hope is to release it on New Year’s Eve! There’s a symmetry to that, no?
  • I’m also immersing myself in all things ebook and Amazon Kindle, because by year end — hopefully much sooner — my book Becoming One will be converted into Kindle and other ebook formats. (My publisher retired and closed her business several years ago, so determining my options, and getting the proper expert help to do it well, falls to me.)
  • I am building an outline for book number two.

A year ago, I could not see anything like this being possible. I almost didn’t recognize it now. Trauma survivors can be so wary of anniversaries that we blot out the positive milestones, too! This is a very happy outcome for me. Hard work does pay off.

Many thanks to everyone who follows this blog, leaves comments, and retweets the Best Tweets posts. Thank you, especially, to the great folks on Twitter who tirelessly tweet the best resources! I am beyond grateful.

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Permanent link to this article: http://thirdofalifetime.com/2010/08/13/its-easy-to-forget-milestones/

Best Tweets for Trauma Survivors (week ending 08/06/10)

Best Tweets for Trauma Survivors is a weekly Friday feature. My selections are entirely subjective, and I know it will never be possible to include every great resource tweeted. But I can try! I’ve personally read all tweeted links, and believe them to be of great value.

Disclaimer: I am in no way responsible for content found on any other website. Stay safe, and don’t follow links if you believe you might be triggered by them. Also, I will not be re-checking links from older Best Tweets posts, and if the site’s archived URL is different from the one I’ve provided here, you may need to do a search on their site.

Please add your candidates for Best Tweets For Trauma Survivors in the comments.

Standalone Tweets

@journeytograce “We are not creatures of circumstance; we are creators of circumstance.” ~ Benjamin Disraeli

@FastSelfHelp “There are some things you learn best in calm, and some in storm.” ~ Willa Cather

@SarahEOlson2009 “It’s funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word / We are screaming inside, but we can’t be heard.” ~ Sarah McLachlan

@therapy4help “Depression sometimes feels like, ‘In the midst of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer.'” ~ A. Camus

@empowermentguru “When we don’t have the courage to change, everything changes around us to direct us to a new path.” ~ Rhonda Byrne

@Tamavista “Courage is a kind of salvation.” ~ Plato

@Annalilie “Seeking external power is fear based, seeking authentic power is love based. You know the difference when you know your intentions.”

@karenKMMonroy “Value and Worth: be impeccable and Know the Difference.”

@soulseedz “Repeat often — I am an amazingly resilient person.”

@mscator “Stress is two forces moving in opposite directions. Sit still.” ~ Buddhist proverb (via @CausesEffects)

@MindfulBoston “When you inhale, send your breath to wherever you feel tension.”

@empowermentguru “You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.” ~ Buddha

@SanityJournals “Locate the calm, quiet place inside you where you feel peace and power amidst the chaos.”

@MetaVisions “Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the lifelong attempt to acquire it.” ~ Albert Einstein

@Tamavista “No matter how far you have gone on the wrong road, turn back.” ~ Kitamori

@jennyjoneses “You cannot find peace by avoiding life.” ~ Virginia Woolf

@CausesEffects “I have had dreams and I have had nightmares, but I have conquered my nightmares because of my dreams.” ~ Jonas Salk

@Annalilie “Broken heart to open heart, this is transcendence.”

Linked Tweets

@kris_burns Help Prevent Suicide
[SEO: Important information about not just the warning signs of someone who is suicidal, but a clue-filled list of what that person’s motivation might be, which may not be all that obvious. Suicide is preventable. Know the signs, get that someone help.]

@drcmblake 7 Simple Ways To Say “No” (via Zen Habits blog)
[SEO: “Rather than avoid it altogether, it’s all about learning the right way to say no.”

@anothernuday HD Hawaii Beaches-1 Relaxation Music Video
[SEO: This is the 2 minute trailer for an iPhone app. Carry your relaxation music with you! (Disclaimer: I have no interest in this app or company. It just seems like a neat idea.)]

@goodthingZ How To Overcome Negativity: 5 Steps to Positive Thinking (via The Skool of Life blog)
[SEO: “It takes humility from a person to recognize their negative mind set may just be wrong or incomplete or overly simplistic.”]

@drcmblake We have more control over our lives than we think (Via Tiny Buddha blog)
[SEO: Actual title: “How to Experience True Freedom to Live a Life with Fewer Limits”]

@ssanquist Simplicity and Basic Sanity
[SEO: Mindfulness and eliminating unnecessary complications.]

@2morrowknight 8 Ways to Be More Confident: Live the Life of Your Dreams (via @tinybuddha)
[SEO: “Maybe you’ve never been as unsure of yourself as I used to be, but you can likely relate to that feeling of wanting to do something but feeling terrified to start.” Start by building your confidence.]

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Permanent link to this article: http://thirdofalifetime.com/2010/08/06/best-tweets-for-trauma-survivors-week-ending-080610/

Favorite TweetStuff (week ending 08/06/10)

I rescue these items from my ever speeding faster TweetStream each week to share their beauty, humor, or maybe just what fascinates me, in a weird way. :) It’s all good! Enjoy!

@2morrowknight SO CUTE! Rare Baby White Tigers Born In German Zoo (VIDEO) (via @HuffPostGreen)
[SEO: Only 250 or so known white tigers in the world; here are the four newest!]

@docmarion “Just think of all the billions of coincidences that DON’T happen.” ~ Dick Cavett

@AmazingPics Where Science, Art and Photography Intersect (25 photos) — My Modern Metropolis

@rodolfofrausto “Find the person that is going to tell you the truth, even if it means upsetting you. That is your real friend.” (via @BlondeTXGoddess @Irmitaari)

@AmazingPics Silly Walk (puffin)
[SEO: He looks like he could take on the Aflac Duck in a soccer rematch.]

@CCConsulting “A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.” ~ George Bernard Shaw

@Tamavista “If your path has no trouble, it doesn’t go anywhere.” ~ Kitamori

@brendacambr “Ok let’s all get in the car :p @Flipbooks Top 50 American Roadside Attractions (TIME)

@zakaraya “We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.” ~ Bill Hicks

@GuyKawasaki How to win at Rock Paper Scissors every time

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Three New Blogs Added to Dissociation Blog Showcase! (DBS)

Special Request: If you find value in this blog showcase, please add the Dissociation Blog Showcase link to your blogroll so others can find it. Thanks!

We have amazing writers amongst us who give insight and hope to anyone struggling with dissociation, or to their loved ones. It’s a brain trust, and I treasure it. When I find new blogs, I update the Dissociation Blog Showcase (DBS) on Sunday evenings. Tonight I’ve added the following three new blogs:

ECLIPSE THE SILENCE

Living With Bipolar Disorder and DID

Myriad Musings

Please use the DBS link above to access these blogs, and check out the entire directory of (currently) 165 dissociation-related blogs!

As always, be careful and safe. Many of these blogs do not provide trigger warnings, nor are they obligated to do so.

I need your help! If you, or someone you know, experiences dissociation and blog about it, write to me with the URL at

sarah.e.olsonATgmailDOTcom

I review each blog before adding it to the Showcase. Thanks so much for the feedback and well-wishes for this project!

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Permanent link to this article: http://thirdofalifetime.com/2010/08/01/three-new-blogs-added-to-dissociation-blog-showcase-dbs/

New: Best Tweets for Trauma Survivors (week ending 07/30/10)

Best Tweets for Trauma Survivors is a weekly Friday feature. My selections are entirely subjective, and I know it will never be possible to include every great resource tweeted. But I can try! I’ve personally read all tweeted links, and believe them to be of great value.

Disclaimer: I am in no way responsible for content found on any other website. Stay safe, and don’t follow links if you believe you might be triggered by them. Also, I will not be re-checking links from older Best Tweets posts, and if the site’s archived URL is different from the one I’ve provided here, you may need to do a search on their site.

Please add your candidates for Best Tweets For Trauma Survivors in the comments.

Standalone Tweets

@Tamavista “Without knowing what I am and why I am here, life is impossible.” ~ Leo Tolstoy

@rcinstitute “TruthfulTuesday: you are not the sum of the stories you tell about yourself; you are more real than this.”

@KinderEric “Our doubts are traitors, And make us lose the good we oft might win By fearing to attempt.” ~ William Shakespeare

@karenkmmonroy “Judgment (including of self) is a false directional mechanism — it always gets you lost.”

@empowermentguru “Compassion allows you to build courage, and courage allows you to be more compassionate.”

@SMARTBuddhist “Getting ‘pissed off’ can show passion and be a strength. Knowing what to be pissed about, and how to be constructive about it, is a virtue.”

@RiaSmithDesigns “Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.” ~ Chinese proverb (via Maria_bg)

@SabineBraun “I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi

@karenkmmonroy “Sometimes life can feel hard, but it’s your belief in hard that makes the hard harder.”

@PixelProject “Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.” ~ Helen Keller

@abusesurvivors “Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

@DrJennifer “Bravery is being truthful with your feelings and being with life as it is in every moment.”

@BeautyofWisdom “Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens.” ~ Carl Jung

@Tamavista “The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.” ~ Carl Rogers

@rcinstitute “FreedomFriday: mental rigidity is a greater prison than any jail.”

@ImpassionedCat “Life’s challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they’re supposed to help you discover who you are.” ~ Bernice Johnson Reagon

@JPBarlow “The most exhausting thing you can do is to be inauthentic.” ~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Linked Tweets

@psychcentral Finding Hope: ‘The Instillation of Hope’ in Therapy and in Life

@hyblis Is Online Psychotherapy Right for You? 5 Points to Consider (Via @therapy4help @ssanquist)

@akvet Understanding and Coping with PTSD (PDF) (via NAMI)
[Prepared by Veterans Healthcare Administration, National Center for PTSD]
[SEO: Focus is on veterans, but much of this information pertains to anyone with PTSD. Includes additional links, and a checklist of questions to ask your doctor. Excellent resource!]

@2morrowknight 42 Practical Ways To Improve Yourself (Via @LeyMarieCel and Lifehack.org)
[SEO: Intriguing ways not just to improve yourself, but many of these suggestions can be used to break out of a rut or the doldrums.]

@STRAY_DOGGY Service Dogs to Help with Psychiatric Disabilities?
[SEO: The range of what a service dog can be taught is fascinating. One example, for people with anxiety or PTSD, a dog can lick the person’s face to help bring him into the present, bring the TV remote to provide a distraction, or in an anxiety-provoking social setting can, by a discreet hand gesture, whine or do other behavior which gives the person a graceful “out”, to leave the room or move away from the group of people or person making him feel anxious.]

@goodthingZ 10 Things to Let Go of Today: Letting Go Is Not the Same as Giving Up

@BeyondMeds The busy mind on meditation: minimal training in meditation can lessen the perception of pain

@drcmblake On Dealing with Fear: Stop Judging Yourself and Be (Via Tiny Buddha Blog)
[SEO: Great post on dealing with fear, from spiders to possibly falling back into a depression pit. “We can challenge and overcome our fears if we’re willing to take power away from them. They aren’t as powerful as we think they are.”]

@zebraspolkadots A Journey… “Big Fat Borderline” (may be triggering)
[SEO: An essay about how the mental health system, with its stereotypes, labels people to their detriment. Don’t allow a label to define your essence and your self-worth.]

@DrKathleenYoung July Carnival Against Child Abuse
[SEO: The theme for the July Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse is “Independence”. A smorgasbord awaits you of blog posts and arts by survivors of child abuse, and by therapists who work with them.]

@patriciasinglet Forgiveness, Done In Layers, not a one-time thing
[SEO: Forgiveness from the point of view of an incest survivor, but food for thought for anyone struggling with this issue. Discusses what forgiveness is and is not about, and how unresolved anger blocks forgiveness.]

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Permanent link to this article: http://thirdofalifetime.com/2010/07/30/new-best-tweets-for-trauma-survivors-week-ending-073010/

Favorite TweetStuff (week ending 07/30/10)

Oh, we have abundance in the Twitter linky goodness account this week! There’s enough beauty, amazement, and amusement to lift my spirits for the weekend. It doesn’t hurt that the weather in Boston is both cooler and drier, for which I am grateful! Enjoy!

@zakaraya “Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.” ~ Homer Simpson

@petapixel Stormy skies (via Boston.com’s Big Picture)
[SEO: A showcase of the last several months’ best storm pictures from around the world.]

@jawillie “FOXNewsSlogans …when thinking for yourself gives you migraines.” (via @dustmyblues)

@johnkunkle Porcupine who thinks he is a puppy! (YouTube) (via @ElyssaD)
[SEO: This is too cute! You have to wear work gloves to pet him, but he sure loves it! Does tricks, too!]

@AdviceToWriters “Talent is helpful in writing, but guts are absolutely essential.” ~ Jessamyn West

@anothernuday Spiritual Flute: The Beauty of Nature (video)
[SEO: Gorgeous flute, and you probably didn’t know that I have a thing for swans. :) )

@BeyondMeds “Turn your face to the sun, and the shadows fall behind you.” ~ Maori proverb

@Quotes4Writers Procrastination is crack for writers
[SEO: A good article about overcoming writer’s block and procrastination. But I mostly just love the title!]

@phaoloo The world’s weirdest shoes (via @Maria_bg)
[SEO: Four shown here, with a link to a larger collection. Yes, they are weird!]

@pourmecoffee All already aboard
[SEO: I love trains, but you couldn’t pay me enough to do this.]

@zakaraya “Some people are so negative, that they can walk into a dark room and begin to develop.” ~ Les Brown

@starZship My cat has gotten so flamboyant. Blame it on Gaga…. (via @CausesEffects @ssanquist)

@MaryDeMuth “Some books leave us free and some books make us free.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

@drcmblake A Rainbow Colored Miracle of Nature to Inspire Your Day (via @Minervity @JackiesBuzz @drcesa)

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